Help Me Faith
by hopkiins
Summary: He awaited the dark, howling atmosphere of the Place of No Stars as his soul carried itself. The anxiety bubbled up in his mind, the voices telling him of the terrible things that were to come in the near future. The tom hadn't expected to be greeted with a field of star and cloud, stretching far and coming to rest just below the southern pole of the moon and the northern tip of t


Trigger warning for violence and character death.

Song quote: "Help Me Faith (Reinterpretation)" by Hammock from the Far Cry 5 soundtrack

_originally published on ao3 (june 24th, 2018)._

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

_"And when I grew old, I was riddled with sin_ _Locked my soul in the dark, never let the light in_ _I crawled towards the gate, with little time left_ _I cried "What have I done?" as I took my last breath…"_

The darkness seemed to welcome Ashfur with open arms after he bled out in the river, his body suddenly feeling so much lighter, so much easier to carry. His legs could carry him with ease and the pain in his throat was no more.

He awaited the dark, howling atmosphere of the Place of No Stars as his soul carried itself. Eyes closed, glued shut. He was still so very tired, so weak. He needed his rest to finish the journey. He'd need it when he would finally arrive in the place in which not even the sun shone. Allowing himself to be carried towards his final resting place brought about so much. The anxiety bubbled up in his mind, the voices telling him of the terrible things that were to come in the near future.

The tom hadn't expected to be greeted with a field of star and cloud, stretching far and coming to rest just below the southern pole of the moon and the northern tip of the blinding sun.

He felt oddly out of place when his eyes settled upon all the good to ever roam the forest. Familiar faces were present, but were judging his every step as his paws carried him towards a sight he thought he'd never see again; Fourtrees.

Sitting atop the boulder that had planted itself in the center so many moons ago was a she-cat with brilliant white fur and striking emerald eyes, which felt like a thousand thorns were piercing Ashfur's form.

He caught sight of Brindleface, who had turned her back from him as they made eye contact. Ashfur no longer worried about the gaze of the white she-cat before him, and instead ached for the comfort of his mother once more. But the look of pure disgust on her face was enough for him to realize that he'd never again receive the motherly love and affection he had gotten when he was a kit.

Eventually his paws had stopped moving, rooting him in place. His gaze returned to the she-cat from before, her tail swishing from side to side as she stared down at the tom, who was giving her his full attention.

"Ashfur," her voice softly booming and echoing all around him, bouncing off the bark-like appearance of the trees, "as an original founder of StarClan and one of the few who now remain, I welcome you. My name is Half Moon."

The tom gaped at her. Half Moon? As in the one who had sent the Clan founders into the forest Half Moon? He ought to be crazy, no, she ought to be crazy. The stories he had heard the elders go on and on and on about were nothing more than that: stories. But the glowing semi-circle above her eyes had proved him wrong.

"I assume that you do not realize why you are here. Your journey had allowed you enough time to contemplate where you'd reside until you've faded," Half Moon went on, green orbs never leaving Ashfur's blue ones. "You've done terrible things, yes, but fate decided to bring you here. You had always been so loyal and ambitious as a warrior and an apprentice. The only fault you had done was loving someone you could not have. Jealousy… can do terrible things to the heart."

Frowning, Ashfur felt himself be pulled down. He had been used and betrayed, realizing now that Squirrelflight would never love him. He was only there to provide comfort for her, nothing more.

A long pause then elapsed. Ears lowering, Half Moon looked out past the other, breaking eye contact at last.

Ashfur followed her gaze, eyes settling on a black-and-white tom who held a curious look to him. But it was a face that he had recognized almost instantly. "Swiftpaw," he breathed out. The apprentice gave him an indifferent mien, then looked back to the she-cat.

"Half Moon, Ashfur had done things that should place him in the Place of No Stars. Had you not witnessed it?!" Swiftpaw exclaimed, sparing a glare towards the tom in question. "He has no right to be here! What has he done to deserve being brought here? This has been a mistake!"

This outburst had caused Half Moon's once caring outlook to harden, eyelids drooping down enough to add to the look.

"You have no right to decide Ashfur's fate, Swiftpaw. If he had been sent here, then he must be good at heart. There is no mistake," she responded, kneading the rock a bit to help her control herself.

"He could have murdered Leafpool's kits!" The young tom spat, yellow eyes narrowing in on the older she-cat.

"Swiftpaw, that is enough," a voice piped up, causing said tom to fall silent.

Another familiar figure stepped up beside Ashfur. Bluestar had always been one of the more recognizable cats in the forest, with her blue-grey fur and long, sleek appearance. But the star that was emblazoned on her forehead was a dead giveaway for who she was.

"Ashfur, despite his flaws, has proven himself worthy. If we felt that this was a mistake, we would have run him down the tunnel to which we would never see him again. We are all equal here, and he has shown that he does not want power," Bluestar said, voice soft as silk but still incredibly confident.

Half Moon hopped down from her spot, now standing directly beside the grey tom.

"She is correct. As I stated before, Ashfur has a good heart. He would never hurt someone who has done absolutely nothing to him," Half Moon agreed, "Now, Swiftpaw, this is a one-on-one conversation. You have no need to be here." Grumbling softly to himself, the used-to-be apprentice did so. Bluestar nodded to Half Moon before following after him.

Ashfur looked back towards the ancient Tribe leader, eyes going wide as he felt her touch their noses together. "You were happiest as an apprentice, and you shall be restored to the body you possessed then. All of your wounds have been healed, as well," she said, pulling back away from the tom.

"I wish you luck as you embark on this new journey," was the last thing she had said before disappearing.

A few glances around Fourtrees had proved that Ashfur hadn't imagined it, and also disproved the idea that she had simply leapt into one of the oak trees when he blinked.

The path of stars that laid behind him had caught his attention. It twisted and winded out of Fourtrees, sparkling all along the way. Ashfur turned himself around and took a deep breath, following the long path towards his new goal: forgiveness.


End file.
